Friendly Missives

I've been gone for three weeks and a mountain of mail awaited me when I returned home. Buried deep in the mound were four missives from my friends at the Internal Revenue Service.

I always appreciate their loan shark attitude (you can say anything with a smile and a gun).

Two letters were duplicates, explaining that the $3000 they filched from me last August had a slight error (heart tremor - could they want more!?!). They explained that they miscalculated my interested and owed me $11.03.

The next item was celebration of the governments phony-baloney stimulus package and all the money I am due to receive. The last time they sent me money (post 9/11 $200 per kid payments), it turned out their largess was taxable income. This time they want to send me $1200 as long as I don't make too much on my 2007 return. So another tax the rich and give to the non-taxpayer scheme.

The last item was a check for $11.03. I'll try not to blow it all in one place. If I hurry, I might still be able to buy three gallons of gas.